PRESS ONE FOR ENGLISH

I have two pet peeves concerning the telephone, and here they are:
FIRST......
“Please press one to speak in English” .....WHY?.... If we have to press one to speak in English and two to speak in Spanish, why don't we have to press three to speak in french, four for Chinese, five for Russian, six for German, seven for Italian, eight for Japanese, and nine for Pig Latin?   

Actually, we shouldn't have to push anything to speak in the language of our country....If anyone pushes anything it should be the outsiders who refuse to learn English. Or better yet, if they can't speak English let them do without a telephone and guess what signs say until they learn.

If they want to enjoy the privileges of the greatest country in the world, let them prove it by becoming Americans and speaking our language.

Who knows, maybe someday we will once again experience the miracle of Acts 2:5-6 when everyone will hear everyone else in there own language. But until then............

SECOND.........
“Your call is very important to us” …..OH REALLY!.....If it is so important, why do you leave me hanging on the phone and listening to your stupid commercials for ten minutes? “I'm sorry I don't believe you, so I'll just hang up and call another company...(I know, the next company probably won't be any better.) Is my attitude showing?
I'll tell you what is fun. When they finally answer, just say, “Can you hold on just a moment?” Then lay the phone down and don't pick it up again for ten minutes.

BUT HERE IS THE BEST PART......
Aren't you glad that God always speaks our language and never put us on hold?   As a matter of fact, our calls really are important to Him and there is never a charge for long distance or roaming.  Notice what His word says about calling him....

Psalm 18:3
I call to the LORD, who is worthy of praise, and I am saved from my enemies.

Psalm 61:2
From the ends of the earth I call to you, I call as my heart grows faint; lead me to the rock that is higher than I.

Psalm 86:3
Have mercy on me, O Lord, for I call to you all day long.

Psalm 86:7
In the day of my trouble I will call to you, for you will answer me.

Romans 10:13
For whosoever shall call upon the name of the Lord shall be saved.

"Lord, thank you for my "Spiritual Cell Phone".  What a great confidence I have knowing that when I call, I will never get a busy signal and that you will instantly take my calls and answer my needs".